Losing it in Utah now.

It's been fluctuating a lot because, well, I keep catching these bugs! I'm gaining and then bam! diarrhea and nausea and not wanting to eat and such. Bleh. I mean, great, it means lower numbers on the scale but those pounds come back and they like bringing friends.

I'm sticking to my WW journal instead now. Just to make sure I eat right and eat enough.

In the meantiiiime, I found this really neat YouTube Video about what 200 calories look like and some calories mean more than others (empty calories vs. nutrient rich calories).

Mmm, broccoli. Also apples give me the runs. But bananas don't and I've been eating a lot of those.

Eating healthy is so much easier when you like what you eat...

Last time I went to the doctor, he said I needed to lose weight. "What's your weight loss goal?" he asked and I spouted off 130. Good for a woman over 30, yannow? According to the outdated BMI charts that were initially just for judging the quality of the 18 year old men enlisted into the military for WWI. Oh yes. If there's a poll out there for updating the BMI chart, I'd like to sign it.

Anyways, he was shocked at the answer and he repeated himself, "What is your weight loss goal for the end of the summer?" Oh. 170. If I can get there by September, I'll be gold. And I charted it out as soon as I got home.

I'm on Weight Watchers Online and if I stick to the plan, I can be at 180 by the time I head out to California in mid July!

It's been a rough week though. Between fights and fillings and drillings and lady bit exams that stuck me to the ceiling, I have kind of been stress eating. And then Father's Day noms and my birthday next Sunday, I'm going to have to work like a dog to get to that 180 in time! Ugh. And I've been struggling to actually keep from falling into a body-shaming malaise. Not anyone else's, I have an indiscriminate eye when it comes to OTHER people but then--well, story time.

Last weekend I went to the Utah Scotland and Highlander Festival. Damsel In This Dress was there and after far too long dreaming of being svelte enough to buy a corset from her (and I mean, it's been YEARS and YEARS that I have wanted a corset from her) I decided that sometimes you have to stop putting off living and just go and enjoy yourself, no matter what.

I know that causes some people to want to put a big fat DISAGREE on my forehead because that goes against so much but, well, after so many years and having gotten so close yet so far, well, I'm going to  keep the goal and give myself another prize for getting there. Maybe another corset.

So here I am again. almost 3 years and 30 pounds later. Hi.

I've been indulging my Spoiled Brat side which means that I can't lose weight. So I am buckling down again and writing all of my intake.

You know what else helps? Tomatoes. I LOOOVE tomatoes, but not store-bought. You HAVE to have the homegrown tomatoes or you might as well just eat a water balloon. Blech. But they're so good with a little salt or sliced on bread. It's amazing.

It's finally harvest time and I am so excited.

And I got back on the Running horse. No, not a real horse, I just popped in my PodRunner podcast again and I started back up. These days I've tried a new technique of running more on the balls of my feet than striking with the heels. It means that when I run, I'm not slamming into the ground. It's a lot smoother but it's also a lot harder on the calves. I'm going to be aching today!

I want to see the 140s soon. I'm hoping that by Thanksgiving, I'm there. That's only just shy of 3 months, I can make it, right? I only have Halloween to worry about there and, of course, my inner Spoiled Brat who needs a good paddling and a time out.

Still, I'm doing well health wise, which is awesome. :D

Well, I was quite surprised to find that it was rather effective, attempting to limit my refined sugar. It was a weak attempt, I have to admit because there were times that I indulged. But I will try again this week to limit the amount of sweets that I eat and try to find healthier alternatives.

I am such a spoiled brat inside, you know that? I wonder if we all have these inner spoiled brats, the ones demanding for this or that thing. The ones that pull urgently at our shirts until we go to the chips and candy aisle, pointing out one thing after another and throwing a temper tantrum until we give in. The ones that know all the best treats in all the worst places.

I need to give my own inner spoiled brat a very good talking to and a time out. If only I knew how. But what works is when I'm dying for something sweet, I have cherries and grapes and pineapples and Fuji apples to sate me instead and then though I still crave the sweet, I am content with far less. Just three M&Ms (no really) and a small bowl of grapes and I'm good!

What other secrets do people employ to satisfy our inner spoiled brats?

I went out to Mimi's Cafe with my aunt for lunch and we got to talking about dieting habits that worked for us. I'm sure that it wasn't the best topic when we were intending to semi-blow the diet for lunch (I still managed to stay on point a little) but conversations are free range and tend to go anywhere.


Aunt Lea mentioned that the only time she really lost weight was when she began cutting out refined sugars. I thought about it and have been thinking about it since. It's a big sore spot, this sweet tooth of mine. I always have a desire for more and more sweets when I don't really need them. So if I can just cut down until I can cut it out entirely, that may really lend itself to more effective weight loss.


So now I am on Sugar Probation. I will allow myself 3 points of refined sugar a day this week instead of splurging and try to find healthy alternatives to sate my crazy sweet tooth.

I changed my weigh in day for Saturday mornings. It's easier that way and I feel like I don't have to starve myself all day on Tuesday for an evening meeting, especially when I have knit nights every other Tuesday that I would rather not miss.

I have been buckling down on tracking and exercise. Every MWF is my 3 mile walk day. I will usually have my phone with me hooked into Pandora and listen to that while I walk along. It's beautiful but it has also been getting warmer and I can't wear my jacket which means the phone has to go in the only pocket available, the bra. It makes it just a little damp and I worry about damage to the phone but so far so good, the phone has survived the cleavage carry. I love the walk, it's so pretty, I live in gorgeous country.

On TRSs, I do Jillian's 30 day shred. It's a tough one and I still work on mastering the advanced levels and I'm doing better at pushups from the toes rather than the knees but still I struggle a good bit. And sweat! I'm thinking when i'm older, I'll be like my mom and sweat like I'd just taken a shower while putting on makeup! Ugh, I hope not.

But all in all, I feel fantastic. I have firmer thighs, tentatively bulging deltoids and I have energy every morning!


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Okay, sometimes the exercise is so hard, there is no actual physical advantage to even half-heartedly attempting it. *sighs and goes back to Level 2 of Jillian Michael's 30-day shred*